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Writer's pictureNicole Woodcox Bolden

The Forgotten First Step to Everything


"Your natural state of mind will make a huge difference in how you feel when life takes a swing at you and hits you its best shot."

-Jairek Robbins

Photo by Neosha Gardner

This technological age that we live in provides us with instant access to almost anything we want to know. This can be both good and bad. This instant download of knowledge can sometimes speed up the process of doing things too much, thus making us forget this important first step. In this "Love Work to Make the Dream Work" series, we are deep diving into some of the unintentional blocks we create for ourselves when trying to achieve our goals or heck just stopping the self sabotage at every opportunity. The important first step we will be discussing today is State of Mind.

How intentional are you to check your state of mind before you do things? Are you preparing yourself everyday to be able to make your best decisions? In business, most people do create their Why statements but many times those why statements really do not take into consideration your state of mind. Meaning how were you feeling before making that why statement, were you trying to impress someone, were you writing that why statement because that is what you thought you were "supposed" to write, did that why statement really make your soul leap, did it make your authentic self shout YASSSS? Before you do anything are you taking a step back to just listen to the guidance of your authentic self?

What do you mean my authentic self, you ask? When I say authentic self, I am talking about the self you are when you are all alone and not trying to impress anyone. The self who says the things you are hesitant to tell others. The self that knows what really makes you happy. The self you are sometimes afraid to show to everyone because you are not sure if they can handle it. The self that is willing to be bold and stare fear right in the face.

Now why is evaluating your state of mind the important first step? In the book "Live It" by Jairek Robbins, he gives a great analogy for understanding the importance of state of mind. He says," if you took a soda can that was a quarter full and handed it to a small child, even though the child may be weak, they would be easily be able to dent or even crush it. However if that same can was 100 percent filled and sealed, it would be much more difficult to dent or crush by squeezing it. When the can is sealed, the pressure is pushing out, and it is more resistant to anything pushing into it" (Robbins pg.140 ) . This is analogy is helpful in showing us how important is to prioritizing daily mind care because without it we can easily be moved or shaken by the day's events. Without daily mind care, we may find it hard to make the next best move to propel us closer to and/or stay steadfast on our journey to achieving our goals.

This step is so easy to ignore but can be so detrimental to us. It reminds me of Warren Buffet's quote,"chains of habit are too light to be felt until they are too heavy to be broken." Personally, the absence of this step has becomes more evident in me when I start to feel burnt out, overwhelmed or easily irritated. When we are more intentional about our state of mind, it is easier to say no to things that do not serve us or our mission. It is easier shake off criticism because we know that criticism, for the most part, is a reflection of the other person not so much ourselves. It is easier to wake up in the morning and go to bed at night because I know I made the best decisions for me that day and know I am good enough to accomplish my goals.

TOOLS:

Daily mind care is putting yourself high enough on your to-do list to carve out at list 20 minutes to Meditate, write a Gratitude List and/ or Read an inspiring book.

1. Go to YouTube and search for meditation videos. You can get more specific, i.e meditation for insomnia, meditation to calm anxiety, meditation for positive thinking, etc.

2. Try journal writing and/or writing gratitude list. Check out our short journal template that includes a gratitude list.

3. Find a book that can fill up your mental tank. Check out the "Live It" book by Jairek Robbins. He has very clear and doable action steps after each of his chapters. No I am not getting any commission for sharing this book. But hey Jairek if you are reading this. :)

Alright, use these tools and come back next week for part 3 of the Love Work to Make the Dream work series!

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